From the Whitney Houston Collection
Queer eye: Lindsay Lohan wore this dress on the cover of Teen Vogue; ever since then, it’s been like…crack cocaine. –Marc Jacobs, Bleecker Street Overheard by: Mat Triebner... Source
View ArticleI Hear Jigsaw Loves Self-Destructive Gym Bunnies
Young woman: I really want a boyfriend who is mean, who can say that, “I’m gonna kill him” and then looks down at his hand, and that laughs. Older woman nods. Young woman: You know, like those villians...
View ArticleWednesday XXX-Liners
Overly flamboyant gay guy on phone: There is no way he can put himself through law school doing hardcore gay porn! –Soho Overheard by: Anastassia Gay boy to another: Pornstars make good money. –L Train...
View ArticleThe Island of Dr. Wednesday One-Liners
Man on cell: Was there a lot of bleeding? [unintelligible reply] Well, was it four sheep or five? [reply] We have to find a way to separate the cows from the sheep. –Elevator, 56th & 8th Drunk...
View ArticleA Typical Saturday Night for David Hasselhoff
Angry drunk yelling at man: Fuck you! Fuck your mother! I hope you die, you piece of shit! Angry drunk’s girlfriend: Will you just calm down? Angry drunk: No, fuck that! I hope he dies! I hope his...
View Article“Oh man! I already got the genie pants!”
Teen boy #1: Yo man, I’m gonna join a gang! Teen boy #2: Ah, ya? What gang? Teen boy #1: Aladdin Kings. Teen boy #3: What the fuck kinda Disney gang is that? Latin Kings, man! Latin Kings! Source
View Article*Raises Hand*
Customer: Yeah, can I get one for the movie where the girl’s vagina has teeth? Box office cashier: Sorry, sir, this show’s sold out. The next one’s at 8:25. Customer: Sold out? How many people actually...
View ArticleThat Way, Meryl Will Be a Lock after Oprah’s Two Terms
Girl #1: The Devil Wears Prada is like, the best movie ever made. Girl #2: Oh, totally. Meryl Streep’s character was fabulous in that! Girl #1: Dude, Meryl Streep should run for President. No, wait....
View ArticleI was born yesterday
Recent college graduate #1: Have you ever seen an actual 8‑track? Recent college graduate #2: Yes, I’ve seen one–but I’ve never seen a movie on one. – Private apartment, Boerum Hill... Source
View ArticleThe Country Finally Gets the Wednesday One-Liner It Deserves
20-something guy to five-year-old boy: No, Wolverine and Barack Obama are not the same person. –Hudson Park Soccer Pitch Overheard by: Kelli Jo Swag guy: Get your Obama condoms, put it on when times...
View Article
